Nose in a book

'The gospel comes through a house key' by Rosaria Butterfield

 

 Esther Court shares what she has been reading recently and how it might impact life after lockdown.

I have just finished this book and have really enjoyed it. It is also available on 'audible' so you can listen whilst doing the washing up, cleaning your car or cooking an evening meal.

The book is authored by a remarkable lady called Rosaria. Rosaria did not grow up in a Christian family, in fact they were atheists. As she went to university she developed a growing hatred towards Christians. She herself was a liberal lesbian feminist, who thought Christians were oppressive – you can read more of testimony in her other book, “The Secret thoughts of an unlikely convert.” At university she wanted to question Christians about their beliefs and about what she believed to be – their ignorance. A local church minister had her around regularly for dinner to discuss, debate, and share food together. It was around this table that Rosaria heard the word of God and later committed her life to Christ. That is where it all starts she suggests, around a dining room table.  

This book calls us to practice radically ordinary hospitality. I guess, in one sense, hospitality is for some of us, something we are longing to do at this time of lockdown, for others of us nothing has changed, and for others we are grateful we don’t have to yet again invite more people over. This book is a wake up call to the church, and you cannot read it and not be challenged. Butterfield states: “practicing radically ordinary hospitality is your street credibility to your watching post Christian neighbours.”  Butterfield is not just challenging her reader to be hospitable inside the church, she is calling us to open our homes and our lives so that a watching world can come to know Christ.  

Of course this does come with sacrifice, as Butterfield openly acknowledges, you will need to be stringent with your expenses, have a fund set aside for hospitality, it will mean opening your home when you don’t feel like it, it will mean people coming to you house at all hours. But these are sacrifices definitely worth paying. Rosaria paints a beautiful picture of a dining table, a table which is full of people, eating simple but good food, sharing deep conversation with one another.  

What would it look like for you do this? 

This is a 'man next door' not Boo Radley!

In the book Butterfield and her family befriend a man who lives at the house across the road, most other neighbours ignore him, he is known as Boo Radley (you won’t get this reference unless you’ve read 'To Kill a Mockingbird', ha-ha). However, Butterfield and her family go out of their way to befriend him, inviting him round for dinner and dog walking together, and slowly but surely, he starts to open up. Later on in the book (don’t worry I wont give any spoilers away) this neighbour gets into trouble. The whole community are in uproar, they want to vent their frustrations, their anger, their questions. Where do they go? They go to the Butterfields. Why? Because they know, that is a place where they can gather together, eat simple but good food and vent all their frustrations and questions. It is a place where no matter your political opinion, your worldview, your age – you are welcomed and you are heard. Isn’t this a wonderful picture? When something in a neighbourhood goes wrong they know there is one place they can run too where they be heard, accepted but also challenged. 

This got me thinking not only about myself but also many others of us in church: would this be true of our local communities? Are our neighbours even aware we are Christians? Let alone find solace around our dining room table? I think this time of isolation can make us helpfully reflect on:

Are we being hospitable? (whether we are one person or a whole family)

Am I sacrificially opening my home to others?

Am I truly listening to people when they come over to eat and drink?

Am I speaking the truth of Christ during those conversations?

I was thinking about life post lockdown, who knows how the world will react, but I have a feeling people will be so enthused for human contact, for meals at others houses, for conversation with neighbours that can stand closer than 2 metres apart. It is as if we have a new opportunity – to be radical in our hospitality.

Maybe a celebration party at our house?

Maybe just drinks?

Maybe a family play day?

How can we establish a place people will come to know Christ, who wouldn’t readily walk into a church building.

“Our post Christian neighbours need to hear and see and taste and feel authentic Christianity, hospitality spreading from every Christian home that includes neighbours in prayer, food, friendship, childcare, dog walking, and all the daily matters upon which friendships are built.”- Butterfield

 There were a few really poignant things I was challenged by Rosaria: 

First off, it was her family daily devotions and prayer time. They do this everyday after dinner. Most nights the Butterfield family have 10-20 people there for dinner, but everyone knows whether they are Christian or not, that after dinner they will participate in the family devotions. You see Christ is at the centre of the meal, of the conversation and of this fellowship.

The second thing is not being perfect. What do I mean by this? Rosaria helpfully highlights that radical hospitality will mean that things wont be perfect, sometimes you wont have enough chairs, that is fine use whatever you can. It doesn’t mean you have to cook the best meals, just ones that go a long way – a good curry or even soup. It means things will probably get spilt on the table or the floor – but that is fine because we cherish the conversations more than the earthly items.

Finally, she helpfully rebukes excuses we probably have all made. The idea that we won’t open our homes because we need ‘family time’ or ‘time alone.’ She calls this out by saying that just because we have others round doesn’t mean we are not together as a family.

 I have been really challenged by this book, in the way I use my money, time, my home, and how I relate to my neighbours or others in my reach. What I appreciate about Rosaria is that she truly lives out what she says, she is sacrificial and this has cost her so many times, but she does it for the sake of the gospel.

“Christians are called to live in the world but not to live like the world. Christians are called to dine with sinner but not sin with sinner. But either way when Christians throw their lot in with Jesus, we lose the rights to protect our own reputation.”